“Mackinac” or “Well…here I am”

Sitting in a really nice hotel in Mackinac City, watching ESPN and surfing the Web, waiting for our ferry ride over to the Island. I’ve never been on Mackinac Island, so I’m kinda looking forward to the trip. A co-worker and I are recording Steve Forbes do a video greeting for an Entrepreneurship and Innovation Symposium Spring Arbor University is hosting on Thursday. He’s up here in Mackinac for some big CEO conference that costs like $10,000 to attend.

We made the five hour drive up here last night and crashed in time to see the very exciting end to Monday Night Football (certainly kicking myself for not starting Santana Moss in my fantasy leagues).

The hotel we’re staying at is clearly seasonal. We paid only $54 for the two of us, it’s right on the lake, and within walking distance of the ferry. It had a great full-scale breakfast, including eggs, sausage, biscuits and gravy, fruit, cereal, and…fresh Belgium waffles 🙂 None of this continental crap.

There was a little feature on ESPN’s Cold Pizza about Green Bay running back Ahman Green. A Pro-Bowl back, he hasn’t notched a 100-yard running game since last November. Call is a slump, for sure.

I kinda feel like that. I haven’t blogged anything worth while in a long time. And on a grander-scale, I haven’t had revelation from God in a while too. Used to be something weekly, if not daily. But it’s just not happenin’ right now.

It certainly isn’t God’s fault. I don’t feel like he decided to stop talking to me. I’m just struggling and for the most part, not asking him his opinion; not seeking him with all my heart. I guess the most troubling part of all this is that I’ve known this for a while and haven’t decided to do anything about it. Just kinda sitting on the sidelines, watching the game being played, but content to leave my position unfilled for the time being. The fact that my team needs me and is at a disadvantage without me doesn’t seem to bother me–at least not enough to change my attitude about it.

So, there it is: the scary honesty of where I’m at. It’s out there for all to know. When I’m stubborn…I’m really stupid 🙂 Reminds me of a friend who was raised in Christian home…but didn’t really do anything with her faith until sometime in her 20s. She said something like: "I always kinda new I’d come around to Christ sooner or later."

I know I just have to decide to care again, but my stubbornness (or should I say, my flesh) says: hold out until you have something "real" and "tangible" to come back to. But Christ wants me to come back to him in faith that he’s good even when I don’t find his goodness real and tangible. And I guess that’s what I’m stubbornly holding out for.

Joel Maust

Joel Maust is a blogger, marketer and photographer living in the beautiful Flathead Valley of northwest Montana.

%d bloggers like this: