We all, like sheep, have gone astray

The thing I hate most about my end share of my relationship with the Lord is my vacillation. I’m simply not steadfast; I’m not firmly situated upon the Rock; my roots don’t go deep. As unemotional and anti-drama I am in most things, I’m a drama-king w/ the Lord and my temperature toward Him is very dependent upon my emotional state. This all, of course, boils down to faithlessness, which my pastor delivered a timely message on last night.

That was kind of a side note. The real reason for this post is to announce that I’ll likely be blogging much less… at least regarding spiritual matters. As I’ve done much internal analysis of late and invited the Holy Spirit to check my motives for a lot of things, I’ve realized I’m quite the wretch. My motives are way off for most things, including many of my blog postings. I apologized for that and ask you forgive me. I’m sure I haven’t done a stellar job of pulling the wool over your eyes as to how spiritual I am, but I’ll confess that my motivations are often in that vein… and nothing comparable to what motivated Christ (Matt. 9:36).

So, this blog is falling in line with probably 95% of the other things I had lined up to impress people with. Time to rethink a lot of things. I’m not saying I’m not going to use this blog any more. I’m just going to be a lot more cautious with what I put on it and make sure my motivations are love and compassion and not self-promotion or frustration.

As a parting church-related thought, I’ll quote a few passages from Red Moon Rising, which I still haven’t finished but am making steady progress on. This book is so good and so timely for my life. I think these words capture well what’s coming down the road for the Church:

For thirty years, the church has been gathering to say ‘Come, Holy Spirit,’ and in His grace He has come. But perhaps the tables are turning. Perhaps it is now the Holy Spirit’s turn and He is saying to us, ‘Come, holy people.’ Perhaps the Holy Spirit is waiting for us to attend His meetings in surprising places. …

Perhaps He longs that we would vacate our buildings from time to time. The people of God are called to scatter and mix, to mingle and move, to influence from a position of weakness, like a small child in a large family, like yeast in a loaf, like a mustard seed beneath a pavement. …

Could it be that the Holy Spirit is weary of attending our meetings and hungers for our presence at His? Perhaps He’s dreaming up a thousand new meeting places, where new sounds and sights burn the eyes and break the heart! Maybe the time has finally come when it will no longer be possible to encounter the fullness of God in Christian conferences and classic meetings. Maybe this is a new day in which the fullness of God awaits us in the streets and clubs and pubs. But will we hear the Holy Spirit saying, ‘Come, holy people’? He waits with Jesus in the darkness until we come, and yet we wonder why maybe He didn’t show up the way we hoped at some of our grand events.

Of course, God will still attend our meetings—Jesus has promised to come whenever we gather in His name. And He is, let’s remember, omnipresent! But perhaps there is a weariness, even a reluctance in His heart, as He gazes back over his shoulder, out the church door, and into the street.

Maybe our 24-7 war cry “Come on!” is flipping around. Maybe we’re in store for some backdraft as the angels yell “C’mon!” at us while we hide in holy huddles and Christian cuddles—even in prayer rooms—so safe and sound in every way. We’ve spent thirty years saying, ‘Come, Holy Spirit…’ and He came. Now, if the Spirit says, ‘Come,’ the question is this: Will we obey?